Somewhere…..somehow I have allowed self-doubt and a bad attitude to creep in. These last few weeks have been less than stellar for me on the bike. My energy has been rock bottom (very anemic) and I would swear that someone as poured cement into my legs. I could go on and on explaining how my diet does consist of high iron foods and that I do take the prescribed mix of vitamins with plenty of iron to address this issue from the hematologist I have. Now I have to wait it out and let things balance back out.
Still, even knowing all of this…the why…the how…somehow a bad attitude creeps in and finds it’s way through tiny cracks.
Saturday I wanted to just cut free from the normal training, racing, scheduled rides and join in with some friends whom I love to ride with. We met for breakfast and then shortly after headed out to the starting point of a very well know route called the “Bakery Ride” for some climbing. Part of the group would split off at a point and do some nasty switchbacks and the other would continue on to the bakery and back down. My initial plan was to do the switchbacks…this soon changed when my legs would just not corporate. They were heavy like cement. It took all I had just to complete this ride. 38 miles of it. I was more than disgusted with this outcome and would have easily racked my bike and just walked away.
Sunday I took some time to regroup. Give myself a break. Remember again why I do any/all of this. Then I received this email/gift from coach…..
Your life is a gift. Your health is a gift. Your body is a gift. Treat it as such. Eat well, exercise smart, listen when something hurts you and communicate. And for goodness sake see what you have done to get where you are today. TODAY! Is what counts. Not the workout that is on the sheet in 5 days... or the race that is in 3 weeks, or the mileage hike that you saw for next week. TRUST in YOURSELF. BELIEVE in YOURSELF. I wouldn't be doing all this stuff if I thought you were a failure for crying out loud or that you are a slacker. I am so proud of you for setting a goal for yourself and having the discipline within your crazy everyday life to take time for you. .... To want something so bad that you are willing to train mentally and physically. 2 years ago If I told you Hey lets go ride our bikes for 4 days and go 6 hours every day and travel in a van full of stinky people.....
YOU are Strong...You are a climber and it can only get better.
So how is that for grounding me and reminding me as to what drives me? The ability to ride on Saturday, no matter how I was feeling, is a true blessing. To lace up my shoes or ride through the beautiful maintains brings music to my soul. Renews me. Restores me.
Today I am going to run my track workout and think of a dear friend that is battling cancer. I will think of how much she desires to visit the ocean and put her feet in the sand just one more time. I will work hard and cherish this blessing of health that I have. Today…and only today’s workouts will be my focus. Tomorrow will hold another day.
Robin
15 comments:
your coach is a smart guy. LISTEN TO HIM....he is right...the guts it takes to do this is not for the faint of heart!!!! your a tought gal!!
Aren't coaches great? I don't know how I ever got along w/o one. Listen to yours and keep things in perspective. I too have had my share of iron deficiency problems and know very well what that does to you physically and mentally. Get your nutrition back on track and everything will fall back into line. You can do it, Robin!!!
That is an awesome sentiment from coach. I wish someone would remind me of those things and believe.
Sometimes we just need to put it all back in perspective, don't we?
Your coach is right. :)
Thats why we pay our coaches for. I like them to think for me sometimes.
"live for today". you hear that in AA and NA all the time.
girl, if you are tired, rest. it's that simple. you are lucky to have a coach that cares. :)
You have one great coach. Your goals can be mental battles, but also don't forget that mental downs can be caused by physically something not being right. Blood checks are always good to do if you think something is "fishy". (As you know I had Lyme)
YES! A gift... even the bad days...
Right on, coach banged the nail in with one swing!
Go get 'em Robin!
I was watching the TV show "Grey's Anatomy", and their cheese-ball wrap-ups usually annoy the hell out of me, but this one actually struck a chord. The theme was that everybody takes pictures of themselves on the summit, or going through the timing gate, because those are the times we want to remember, not all the pain and struggle of getting there.
Thinking about this it struck me that this is very true. Ever notice that at the end of a game it's as if the losing team no longer exists? No interviews with the losers, who wants to hear from losers?
My next thought was that we here at BlogSpot are the glaring exceptions. We share all of our struggles, pains, self-doubts and trials. My BlogSpot friends are the best support group I have ever had. What we do here, and do for each other, is really amazing.
Your coach said it as well as can be said, and I know you will find a way back, and server as an inspiration to us all in the process.
Sounds like your email from your coach couldn't have come at a more perfect time! :)
You are amazing, and Coach is right. Sometimes it's easy to lose focus of that gift of Today with all that goes on in our lives. It happens to me frequently, and it's almost harder to get the mental discipline going than it is to make myself go run or go to the gym.
With the news we got a few minutes ago (we miss so much going to bed so early...), I think that right now is the best time of all to stay focused and reach our goals with purpose. Because some people never get the chance to do that.
Love ya. :)
Awesome post! This is just wanted I needed to read to help me rid of my less than great attitude.
Beautiful post, sweet friend. Enjoy each day...the present...as a gift from Him. Love you!
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